Because the worst is over.
Now I'm just gonna relax make full use of my time here while I still can.
It'll be easier, for now I'll be able to put my whole soul into music, without having the pressure of exams. And I don't mean that I didn't put my whole soul into the music while preparing for or during exams - I did. With all my sweat and blood. But there's something different about it when you're not rushing and striving to get that piece just right, ploughing through the endless technical exercises, soaking every advice your teacher has to offer, and finally hoping/praying you don't blow it in the examination room.
Now I have space. Space to explore new sounds, experiment with nuances, thoughtfully shape the phrases, widen my color pallete, and ultimately make the music my own. There is more to music than I initially thought. Music travels waaay beyond just getting the notes right, following all the performance directions on the score, and practicing endlessly on various technical exercises and studies. Even expressing and interpretating the piece requires thinking, decision making, listening to countless recordings (youtube helps, big time), and research. Only then, can you let go of everything you have absorbed and pounded in, and just let the music take you as you effortlessly glide over the notes you have gone over hundreds of times.
After all, music is more than just a number you put on a piece of paper. It's subjective; it deals a lot with tastes, character, and style. You can play a piece over and over again, and find something new each time. It's an endless journey, a lifetime of learning and discovery.
Which, again, explains why I love music so dearly.